I am a terrible athlete. I don't even think I could call myself a terrible athlete.
I am a non-athlete.
And my lack of skill applies to all sports — from hockey to bowling.
I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "How do you know you're bad at hockey? I bet you've never even played!"
That's where you're wrong. I totally play. This is my rookie season. Full equipment. Costly enrolment. Weekly humiliation. The whole deal.
Also — I bowled last Saturday. Despite the "turkey" (that's three strikes in a row!) I warmly recall bowling in my parents' living room at Christmastime, it seems my Wii skills do not translate into the real game. I bowled at 38.
(For those of you unfamiliar with bowling scoring, that is a terrible score. That's the score of a first-timer. A toddler first-timer.)
I can't help but think that if I excelled at sports, I would be in better shape because I would enjoy staying active.
What do you think? Are you sporty? Does it help you stay in shape? Or maybe, like me, you were humiliated in elementary school gym class to the point where the idea of even throwing darts or playing badminton makes you feel a little sick. Do you subject yourself to sports despite your shortcomings in an attempt to stay fit?
The New Mediterranean Diet Cookbook
I know — no one wants to leave a reply spilling their guts about how their Grade 4 gym teacher made them cry in the middle of their gymnastics routine and how, even now, the thought of spandex makes them weep a little bit on the inside.
But it's cathartic. You'll see. You are not alone. And to sweeten the deal and encourage you to confess, I have a huge book giveaway for you. The person with the sorriest story — or sweetest story of perseverance — will win:
- The New Mediterranean Diet Cookbook: A delicious alternative for lifelong health by Nancy Harmon Jenkings
- The Diet Detective's Count Down: 7500 of your favorite food counts with their exercise equivalents for walking, running, biking, swimming, yoga and dance, by Charles Stuart Platkin
- Fat Proof Your Family: God's way to forming healthy habits for life, by J. Ron Eaker, MD
- Happiness: How to find it and keep it, by Joan Duncan Oliver
- The Source: Beat fatigue, power up your health and feel 10 years younger, by Woodson Merrell, M.D
- Jaime Brenkus' Get Lean in 15 — 15 ways in 15 days to shape up and slim down . . . fast!
- The Instinct Diet: Use your five food instincts to lose weight and keep it off, by Susan B. Roberts, Ph.D.
That is a huge, fabulous prize. For a chance to WIN, just Subscribe to This Blog and then leave a reply, telling us your story.
Let us know by Monday, April 6. I'll announce the big winner here on Tuesday, April 7.
Weather forecasts that predict temperatures in the double-digits. Rolling up a winning rim. Knowing there's still a chance that the Ottawa Senators will make the playoffs. These things make me happy.
