Do you have 'mummy guilt' this summer?
There's one thing my kids, ages 7 and 10, just can grasp in the summer ... and that's why I have to work.
"Why? Why?" my 7 year-old asks repeatedly.
Sophie is a smart cookie (not that I am biased or anything) but it just doesn't make sense to her. I secretly wish she ran corporate Canada so her philosophy of 'summer's for staying home and having fun' would rule the workplace.
Couldn't everything just be put on hold from June 30 to Aug 31 so we could all hit the beach?
I explain to Sophie the concept of household expenses, clothing etc. and the corresponding need to earn money to pay for said things. The feminist side of me is also quick to point out that this mum likes to work.
'Sweetie, I went to school and studied hard to work in a profession I love. And I want you to do the same."
Sophie pauses for a moment and then declares: 'I'm going to be a teacher when I grow up. They are the only adults who have fun in the summer.'
Summer is ripe with mummy guilt. I talk to so many mum friends who worry if they have their kids in too many camps, in the right ones, feel horrible that they don't have more time to spend with them, and fret over having to work such long hours before taking a much-deserved vacation with their families.
It's never easy being a working mum. But my take is that it's toughest in the summer when the pressure is on full-force to be relaxed and there for your kids ... at least if they are not teens, yet, and actually want you around!
The answer isn't for all us working mums to quit our jobs. There has to be a better way.
One solution that worked for me this summer was to swap childcare with a neighbour. This week my daughter, Liv, 10, is camping up north with Ally and her daughter, Olivia. (Sophie is with grandma).
Next week when I'm off on holidays, we'll take Ally's daughter away with us. It's one week that both Ally and I don't have to deal with mummy guilt.
Do you experience mummy guilt in the summer? How do you juggle work and spending time with your kids?
If we all share ideas, we can spend less time stressing and more time having fun with our kids.
Until next time, Kathryn
August 12th, 2009 at 8:12 pm
I do the same thing....I swap sleepovers and outings.
August 13th, 2009 at 9:11 am
I have an idea, we should receive a small pension from the goverment to stay home with our kids until they go off to University and then we could go to work and not feel so guilty. It's just and idea.
August 20th, 2009 at 12:40 am
I agree. I have really suffered with mommy guilt this summer too. We began the summer with my daughter telling me I need to be a teacher so I can have the summer off with her. I feel like the summer went by so fast and I barely had a chance to spend the time I wanted to with my girls. I like the swap idea. And the government pension idea. I love my job and choose to work, but it would be nice to have the summer to spend with my kids.
August 21st, 2009 at 8:11 pm
I am a stay at home parent and the 'mummy guilt' doesn't only stick to working mums. My kids (9 & 4) ask repeatedly why they can't go to camp, theme parks, the beach and other outings...daily. When I explain that we decided that until the kids were in school full time, that I would stay home and look after them, they stare blankly. I try to explain that if I worked outside the home, their time would be planned for them and there'd be more money for those things but also less time with me. Mummy guilt happens to the best of us!