What a gorgeous September it's been so far, hasn't it? I am loving this weather — the glorious sunshine and cool nights. I was just commenting to a co-worker that if I didn't have kids, I'd take my holidays this month.

But I do have kids ... otherwise I wouldn't be writing this mum blog ... and telling you about a mum (and dad) dilemma that I'd like your help with. Here goes.

My 10 year-old daughter, Liv, has groovy purple iPod. Well, actually she HAD said ipod. In case you haven't already guessed, my dilemma is to do with the absence of this treasured tech toy.

Liv got the iPod from myself and her dad (my husband, Len) last Christmas as her special gift ... and she adores it. But about two weeks ago, it went missing.

Liv swears she last used it in the car ... or the back deck? ... or the back screened-in porch? It was one of those places, she is certain of that. But now we've searched the car, the backyard, the back deck, the kitchen, the bedroom, the ... well, you get the picture: We've searched the whole darn place and — alas — groovy purple iPod is gone and Liv is sad.

So-o, what's a mum to do?

As you know, iPods are not cheap. And I'm trying to strike the right balance in handling the loss of it because Liv is a good kid and I don't think she was careless with it.

Do we:

(a) Tell her she'll have to wait for Christmas for a new one?

(b) Go 50/50 with her on buying a new one (she has some pocket money saved up)?

(c) Buy a new one for her?

(d) Give her chores to do so she can earn a new one?

Write and tell me how you'd handle the situation. Thanks, Kathryn

There's one thing my kids, ages 7 and 10, just can grasp in the summer ... and that's why I have to work.

"Why? Why?" my 7 year-old asks repeatedly.

Sophie is a smart cookie (not that I am biased or anything) but it just doesn't make sense to her. I secretly wish she ran corporate Canada so her philosophy of  'summer's for staying home and having fun' would rule the workplace.

Couldn't everything  just be put on hold from June 30 to Aug 31 so we could all hit the beach?

I explain to Sophie the concept of household expenses, clothing etc. and the corresponding need to earn money to pay for said things. The feminist side of me is also quick to point out that this mum likes to work.

'Sweetie, I went to school and studied hard to work in a profession I love. And I want you to do the same."

Sophie pauses for a moment and then declares: 'I'm going to be a teacher when I grow up. They are the only adults who have fun in the summer.'

Summer is ripe with mummy guilt.  I talk to so many mum friends who worry if they have their kids in too many camps, in the right ones, feel horrible that they don't have more time to spend with them, and fret over having to work such long hours  before taking a much-deserved vacation with their families.

It's never easy being a working mum. But my take is that it's toughest in the summer when the pressure is on full-force to be relaxed and there for your kids ... at least if they are not teens, yet, and actually want you around!

The answer isn't for all us working mums to quit our jobs. There has to be a better way.

One solution that worked for me this summer was to swap childcare with a neighbour. This week my daughter, Liv, 10, is camping up north with Ally and her daughter, Olivia. (Sophie is with grandma).

Next week when I'm off on holidays, we'll take Ally's daughter away with us.  It's one week that both Ally and I don't have to deal with mummy guilt.

Do you experience mummy guilt in the summer? How do you juggle work and spending time with your kids?

If we all share ideas, we can spend less time stressing and more time having fun with our kids.

Until next time, Kathryn

Ok. I can't dodge the issue anymore. What am I talking about, you ask? My niece.

A couple of weeks ago, I told you that my teenage niece had come to live with us for the summer. A few of you asked, 'How's it going?' (Thank you for asking!)

Some people sent me their horror stories of teens gone wild... girls, er nieces, to be precise  ... in their own homes. (Hmm, why am I less reluctant to express my appreciation for that?)

Then I posted a list of great books on parenting teens. More people wrote and asked, a bit more pressing this time, "So-o, how's it going with the niece mum blogger?"

A master of deflection, I gave you a great 'win-some-wine' contest. Yes, it's confession time: I'm avoiding the issue.

It's not that things are going terribly awry. Overall, they are actually pretty good.

At the heart of the matter is the fact that I didn't ask my niece or sister (niece's mum) if I could blog about the situation before I opened my big mouth. And it turns out (surprise, surprise) my lovely niece would rather I not tell tales - good or not so good - out of home.

This led to a discuss with my great co-workers here at Canadian Living magazine and among my girlfriends. Here's what we mulled over:

In an age in which so many people have blogs and are on Facebook or MySpace, how much of our trials and tribulations with others should we be sharing with the rest of the world - without asking those people involved (friends, kids, spouse etc.) if they mind first?

A question worth thinking about, indeed. Especially when what we put online stays online - forever.

What do you think?

How much should we disclose?

And  do we owe it to the people in our lives (particularly our kids) to ask their permission before we blab on about their dating woes, acne breakouts or temper tantrums?

I want to know what you think -- and I have a Canadian Living cookbook to give away!

I was so pleased when [yellow tail] wines contacted me about this offer because their Shiraz and Merlot wines are two of my favorite picks for hostess gifts when I get together with my girlfriends and other families.

Ok, enough with the personal banter. I know you just want to know what (and how) you can win. Here goes.

The winemaker has created its own customized version of Monopoly and to celebrate they are giving away a copy (a collector's item worth $60).

What do you have to do to win? Write and tell me how you play by your rules with your whackiest wine and food pairing.

Talk to you soon, Kathryn

Sorry I have been an absent blogger for the past week. I took some time away from work and the computer to enjoy the spring sunshine with my kids.

While I love surfing and writing online, I'm a big believer in brief sabbaticals from it all.

It's still gloriously warm and sunny here in Toronto, but our country is bathed in sadness from the loss of a little girl, Victoria "Tori" Stafford who was abducted and murdered in Woodstock, Ont.

When the tragic news broke yesterday, I know every mother was thinking of Tori's mum ... and the unbearable weight of her grief. I chatted with my neighbour last night — a stoic accountant who told me she broke down in tears in the office.

I also know that every mum, like me, was thinking twice about her own kids' safety.

The reality is that we can't protect our kids from every danger — and at the same time we can't scare them to death, or deny them the freedom and independence that they need to grow and make good decisions for themselves.

A few weeks ago my 10 year-old daughter, Liv, saw me at the computer watching the grainy video of a woman leading Tori away from her school. That same woman is now charged with her abduction. I told Liv what I was watching. I also told her, 'No matter what the person says ('Keep quiet and come with me or I'll hurt you and your family') scream and kick like hell if anyone tries to get you to go somewhere with them.'

In the coming days, I'll have a talk with both my daughters about strangers and safety. I'm not sure what I'll say, but I know my challenge will be striking that fine balance between giving them the information they need to be safe and not instilling fear.

What will you tell your kids?

P.S. The first 10 people who reply will receive a copy of The BlackBerry Diaries - Adventures in Modern Motherhood by Canadian funny lady, Kathy Buckworth.

Mom blogs. Why are they called that? Because the writer is a mom?

Well, aren’t all of us moms a lot of other things, too? And isn’t the real reason why we are connecting simply because we are women? And as women we have a wonderful desire and capacity to share our thoughts and get to know one another. Why, it’s wired in our DNA.

I thought about this when I told a girlfriend yesterday that I’d posted my first entry on my “Mom blog."

We laughed and said it reminded us of the times when we’ve introduced ourselves as “So-and-so’s mum” on the playground, and then asked, “Are you James’ mum?” When my kids (now 10 and almost 7) were younger, I remember being called “Liv’s or Sophie’s mum” more than “Kathryn.”

(Note: my parents are from England. Most of my family still lives there so I say “mum” a lot)

I’ll let you in on a little inside joke here at Canadian Living. When the “Mom Blog” banner with my photo was first designed for the CL.com web site, it featured my pic and … (drum roll, please) … a backpack. Yes, that dependable, practical symbol of all things mommsy.

When our lovely (and non-mom) web editor, Jen, emailed the image to me, I said, “Jen, see what happens when you have kids? Your existence will forever be associated with a backpack.”  (That sobering reality might actually be an effective form of birth control for the under-30 set).

I wasn’t complaining, mind you. But Jen got the point and soon revamped the image. Now, you’ll see my pic with a charming (but practical, sigh) purple tote bag with a journal, car keys and … a teddy bear.

Truth be told, said bear is not mine, nor my kids. Their favourite stuffies are a hippo, “lambie” and a panda. And being the chic mum that I like to think that I am, I’d never be caught dead with them tucked in my tote.

Ok, enough.

I bet you are reading my mom/mum blog because in my first and last post, I promised you could win a blender and now you’re saying, “Where’s the blender mom/mum blogger? Just tell me how I can get the darn blender!”

The first three people who subscribe to my blog and post a comment telling me what they want to make in the blender - or when they least feel like a mum - will win an OSTER® DIGITAL BLENDER (retail value $79.99). Thanks Oster!

P.S. Here’s what I like best about the blender: it has an ice crusher blade that won't dull or bend as well as an ice-crush setting. Make yourself a frozen cocktail.