Posts Tagged ‘family’

iPod gone AWOL: What should I do?

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

What a gorgeous September it's been so far, hasn't it? I am loving this weather — the glorious sunshine and cool nights. I was just commenting to a co-worker that if I didn't have kids, I'd take my holidays this month.

But I do have kids ... otherwise I wouldn't be writing this mum blog ... and telling you about a mum (and dad) dilemma that I'd like your help with. Here goes.

My 10 year-old daughter, Liv, has groovy purple iPod. Well, actually she HAD said ipod. In case you haven't already guessed, my dilemma is to do with the absence of this treasured tech toy.

Liv got the iPod from myself and her dad (my husband, Len) last Christmas as her special gift ... and she adores it. But about two weeks ago, it went missing.

Liv swears she last used it in the car ... or the back deck? ... or the back screened-in porch? It was one of those places, she is certain of that. But now we've searched the car, the backyard, the back deck, the kitchen, the bedroom, the ... well, you get the picture: We've searched the whole darn place and — alas — groovy purple iPod is gone and Liv is sad.

So-o, what's a mum to do?

As you know, iPods are not cheap. And I'm trying to strike the right balance in handling the loss of it because Liv is a good kid and I don't think she was careless with it.

Do we:

(a) Tell her she'll have to wait for Christmas for a new one?

(b) Go 50/50 with her on buying a new one (she has some pocket money saved up)?

(c) Buy a new one for her?

(d) Give her chores to do so she can earn a new one?

Write and tell me how you'd handle the situation. Thanks, Kathryn

"The World Needs Your Child" Winners ... and Tips

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

Congratulations to Sue and Cheryl who have each won a copy of The World Needs Your Child - How to Raise Children Who Care and Contribute (me to we books, 2009) by Craig and Marc Kielburger and Shelley Page.

Here are 8 parenting pearls of wisdom from this great book that I would like to share with you:

1. Of course your children are gifted: Your challenge and joy is to help them discover their talents.

2. Give the presence of time: Don't rush. Let your child discover her own abilities at her own speed.

3. Make room to explore: Your talents are your talents. Give your kids the freedom to find their own way to shine.

4. Take an interest in their interests: If your child is fascinated with dinosaurs, take him to the library or the natural history museum. No matter the flavour of the month, help him explore.

5. No pain, no pain: Dragging a kid to practice only works for so long. Help him find his groove.

6. Encourage effort, not results: Marks and scores are important to a point. A the end of the day, the real goal is for your child to feel a sense of accomplishment.

7 . Model optimism: Tell your children that you have faith in them and believe they can succeed.

8. Show and share: Encourage kids to share their talents with friends, family and community.

If you have any other tips, please share them. Talk to you soon.

Back to school: Day One

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

For the most part, the first day back to school went smoothly in our home.

My oldest daughter, Liv, 10, was a bit anxious last night. But she calmed down when we assured her that her grade 5 teacher wouldn't mind that she had forgotten how to do long division and spell the days of the week in French over the summer. She woke up this morning, ready to take on the new year.

Sophie, 7, skipped from our house to the school yard - five minutes away. But she froze and turned ashen when another mom announced that the grade 1/2 teacher had broken her leg last night (what timing!) and there would be a supply teacher for at least a week. Sophie wouldn't let go of my hand until the last child in her class was finally marching in the door and she had no choice but to follow.

Oh, how I hate going to work knowing one of my kids is not happy or stressed.

The good news is that my husband picked the girls up at 3:30 and called me to say they both had a great day. (Sophie loved the supply teacher - her older sister used to call them "surprise" teachers).

The best back-to-school story came to me from a former co-worker who left Canadian Living magazine last week to pursue a degree in environmental studies. Miriam went to orientation day at University of Toronto this afternoon and then and emailed me  to say a lot of students brought their parents ... and it was the parents who were asking all the questions.

Yes, this is university! Talk about not being able to let go.

I hope the first day back to school went well for your family. Write and tell me your stories!

- Kathryn

P.S. Tomorrow I'll announce two winners of book contest.

How do you give back?

Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

Welcome to September! (I know I'm a few days late.)

Forget Jan. 1st, for me, this month is the official start of the new year. Time to get back into routines, take stock and set some new goals ...

For a while, I've been thinking about the community and volunteer committments I have in my life. Figuring out exactly how I want to "give back" is on my list of 'things to do' this month.

Recently, I have served on my daughters' school council and lent a hand at functions at my local United Church (which does a great job of helping out the homeless and those with addictions). I'm also big on charity walks.

I love getting involved in my community. Despite the time committment in my busy life (doesn't every mum have a 'busy life'?), the work energizes me, fills me with a sense of purpose and, all too often, reminds me that I have a lot to be grateful for.

This fall, now that my girls are getting older (enterings grades two and five), I want to get them more involved in the community and volunteer efforts as well. I think I'll start by taking them to the annual Run for the Cure (for breast cancer).

I'm open to new ideas and suggestions so tell me ...

What kind of volunteer/community efforts are you invovled in? What about your kids?

Talk to you soon and watch out for a new contest that I'll post on Fri. Sept 4th.

Do you have 'mummy guilt' this summer?

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009

There's one thing my kids, ages 7 and 10, just can grasp in the summer ... and that's why I have to work.

"Why? Why?" my 7 year-old asks repeatedly.

Sophie is a smart cookie (not that I am biased or anything) but it just doesn't make sense to her. I secretly wish she ran corporate Canada so her philosophy of  'summer's for staying home and having fun' would rule the workplace.

Couldn't everything  just be put on hold from June 30 to Aug 31 so we could all hit the beach?

I explain to Sophie the concept of household expenses, clothing etc. and the corresponding need to earn money to pay for said things. The feminist side of me is also quick to point out that this mum likes to work.

'Sweetie, I went to school and studied hard to work in a profession I love. And I want you to do the same."

Sophie pauses for a moment and then declares: 'I'm going to be a teacher when I grow up. They are the only adults who have fun in the summer.'

Summer is ripe with mummy guilt.  I talk to so many mum friends who worry if they have their kids in too many camps, in the right ones, feel horrible that they don't have more time to spend with them, and fret over having to work such long hours  before taking a much-deserved vacation with their families.

It's never easy being a working mum. But my take is that it's toughest in the summer when the pressure is on full-force to be relaxed and there for your kids ... at least if they are not teens, yet, and actually want you around!

The answer isn't for all us working mums to quit our jobs. There has to be a better way.

One solution that worked for me this summer was to swap childcare with a neighbour. This week my daughter, Liv, 10, is camping up north with Ally and her daughter, Olivia. (Sophie is with grandma).

Next week when I'm off on holidays, we'll take Ally's daughter away with us.  It's one week that both Ally and I don't have to deal with mummy guilt.

Do you experience mummy guilt in the summer? How do you juggle work and spending time with your kids?

If we all share ideas, we can spend less time stressing and more time having fun with our kids.

Until next time, Kathryn

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