Leaving baby for the first time

Picking a sitter
Doting new grandparents are an obvious choice, especially if they live close by. Richter was lucky enough to have both her mother and mother-in-law nearby to take on baby duty so that she and her husband could go out to celebrate their first anniversary. "We are extremely lucky to live so close to our parents," she says. "It certainly makes things easier." As your baby gets older and more used to spending time away from Mommy and Daddy, you may want to consider expanding your selection of sitters.

How to prepare
Before your date, make sure to have a practice run or two. Let the prospective sitter spend time with your baby and help them get to know each other. Dr. Tobin also recommends running through the "What-ifs." Such as,"What if the baby won't stop crying? What if the baby won't feed? What if the baby won't fall asleep?" she says. She also recommends writing a "how-to book" for your baby, with details on such things as how your baby prefers to be fed and put to sleep.

When O'Krafka parents arrived for their first round of babysitting duty, he and his wife briefed them on how to keep their daughter happy. "We arranged for a bath," he says, "the right music for dancing around, the right toys laid out -- and my cell number in case she just wasn't buying into being away from Mom and Dad."

Enjoy your time
It's only natural to have your mind at home with your baby, but try to have a good time as well. "At first I felt a little guilty for going out," says Richter, "but then I felt terrific -- I felt like my husband and I were dating again. And since I had expressed prior," she adds, "I had my first glass of wine in nine months -- it felt great!" Also keep in mind that it's okay to phone home. "You should check in as often as you need to feel comfortable," says Dr. Tobin.

Practice makes perfect
Above all, remember that it will get easier every time you go out -- and even more so with subsequent children. "I feel like an old pro," says Moshinsky, whose second child is almost four months old. "I'm not necessarily better prepared, but I have more trust in the caregivers and know that babies are resilient." So go ahead and make your first postbaby date. With proper planning, you know there's nothing to worry about.

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