Childhood faith questioning

Do you want to say a prayer?

Canadians practise a quiet, very private faith. More Canadians pray regularly than attend religious services. The Religion Poll conducted by the Ipsos Reid Canada revealed that on any one day in Canada, almost a third of Canadians pray. Those Canadians who pray the most live in the Atlantic provinces, where 37 per cent pray daily. In British Columbia, only 20 per cent pray daily. An interesting finding of the Religion Poll is that 49 per cent of Canadians feel that God always answers their prayers.

Almost all the world's religions expect their adherents to communicate with their god or gods through prayer or meditation. If your child wants to share her prayers, encourage her. If she seems reluctant, assure her that no two people pray the same way. Some use memorized prayers to start, then chat to God as casually as they would to their next-door neighbour. Other people's prayers are full of ritual and ancient words. If your child shows an interest in learning new prayers and you don't know any, look for a book of children's prayer in a library or bookstore.

If prayer is a part of your life, help your child learn how you pray. Try to put into words for her your own experience of prayer. Do you look in on your sleeping children at night and thank God for them? Do you pray for strength before you walk into a hospital room to visit a dying relative? If you're both comfortable with the idea, try praying out loud. The grace, or prayer of thanks, you offer before a meal can help your child recognize the sacred in everyday life. Difficult times for a family bring family members together, and you may want to pray as a family. When Grandma's sick, pray together to ask God's help in coping with the illness. Let your child know that no problem is too small or too big for prayer. Also ask your child to consider that while it's wonderful to be able to talk to God, it's also important to listen to God. All religions ask us to listen. When you listen, you move from trying to control God to letting God direct you.

Just as you would in any other area of parenting, get professional help if you find it difficult to address your child's spiritual concerns. You don't need to shoulder the theological challenge alone. Phone up a local minister, rabbi, or priest. You don't need to belong to a mosque, synagogue, or church to receive counselling there. If your child is struggling with a spiritual issue specific to suffering or illness, you may want to consult a hospital chaplain. And some police and fire departments have chaplains to offer counselling to people caught up in a crisis.