How to help your kids express their emotions

Here are three Comfort, Play & Teach tips to help your child cope with feelings.
1. Comfort your child by taking his feelings seriously. For example, say something like: "I can see that you are feeling very disappointed that the present wasn't for you." Showing that you understand his feelings will help him see that his feelings are normal and not something he needs to be ashamed of or hide from you.

2. Play pretend games. This allows toddlers and preschoolers to experiment with a range of emotions and situations safely and without real consequences. A typical imaginary play situation for most preschoolers is "a visit to the doctor." In this scenario they tell another child, "This may hurt but then you will feel better." This kind of role playing allows children to take control of a fearful situation and make it turn out the way they want.

3. Teach your child how to manage his feelings by showing your child how you manage your own emotions. For example, modeling how you calm yourself down in the midst of a very frustrating or stressful situation is a powerful way to get your message across.

Books and songs about feelings
You can also read books with your child like The Feelings Book by Todd Parr and The Way I Feel by Janan Cain, and sing songs like If You're Happy and You Know It. When playing games together, be a positive influence if your child gets upset. Help him to be calm, to try to remain positive and to know that he might not win or be first all the time.

These activities will help your child build important skills he'll need when he's away from you. He'll become aware of what he has in common with others. He will learn to explore and express ideas and feelings in a variety of forms and he will begin to recognize that there are choices about how to express feelings.  

Knowing that he has lots of ways to express and manage his emotions will build your child's self-confidence and self-control, important tools to help him make friends and enjoy attending school or daycare for the first time.

To learn more about children's feelings, Invest in Kids and Comfort, Play & Teach, visit www.investinkids.ca.

Read more:
• How singing helps your child's development
• How over-parenting can help your child's development
• 5 ways to teach your kids responsiblity

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Invest in Kids is a national charity dedicated to helping parents become the parents they want to be. By translating the science of parenting and child development into engaging, easy-to-understand, relevant resources for parents and professionals, Invest in Kids aims to strengthen the parenting knowledge, skills and confidence of all those who touch the lives of our youngest children to ensure the healthy social, emotional and intellectual development of children from birth to age five.