Teen sexuality

A Teen's Point of View: My Body

My body is changing so rapidly that it can scare me. If I'm a late developer, I may worry about being left behind. I need your help to accept what's happening to me.

Age Thirteen
All Kids

• My bones grow faster than my muscles, so I'll start looking awkward and uncoordinated.
• I get jumpy when I have to sit for a long time.
• I may not be at my best first thing in the morning on a school day. I like to go to bed late and sleep in the next morning.
• I may mumble in my sleep.
• My nose may stick out until the rest of my face grows to catch up with it.
• I have a very healthy appetite. Please don't tease me or make an issue out of how much food I need to eat.

Girls Only
• I could be well on my way to physical and sexual maturity, while most of the boys are just beginning puberty.
• If my periods haven't started yet, they likely will this year, although they could start any time up to age seventeen. And if I'm like most girls, the onset of my periods won't mark the first stage of my sexual development, but one of the last stages.
• One breast may be bigger than the other. It may always stay bigger, just as I have one hand or foot bigger than the other.
• From so much rapid growing, I might get red-purple stretch marks on my hips or breasts. They'll fade with time.
• The hair on my legs gets darker. I get more hair under my arms and in my pubic area.
• My oil and sweat glands become more active. I may have acne.
• Very gradually, my voice continues to get lower.

Boys Only
• I'll grow taller this year, but I probably won't have my big growth spurt until next year.
• My penis gets longer but won't necessarily get thicker yet, so it may look thin in proportion. The skin of my scrotum gets clarker. One testicle will probably hang lower than the other.
• I get more pubic hair and more underarm hair. If I haven't used deodorant yet, I'll probably need to start.
• I get erections more and more often. They happen spontaneously, sometimes when I least expect them-for example, in the middle of class. This can cause me a lot of embarrassment.
• I get wet dreams, which cause me to ejaculate involuntarily in my sleep.
• The hair at the corners of my upper lip-what will ultimately be my moustache-gets a little darker, but I don't need to shave yet.
• My voice may start to change, getting deeper and maybe cracking a little.

Age Fourteen
All Kids

• I have a lot of energy and enthusiasm. I'm usually up for anything.
• I like to be busy all the time. If I have too much time on my hands and not enough activity, I get bored and restless.
• I'm less likely to need reminders to go to bed an school nights. I recognize when I'm tired and I don't fight it. If I push myself too hard during the day, I might need the occasional nap after school.
• I talk in a loud voice, even when you're sitting right beside me. I'm not doing it on purpose: As my body grows and changes, I'm not always aware of the strength of my own voice.
• I continue to have a good appetite. I may still wolf down everything that's put in front of me, or I may become a little more discriminating.
• I'm developing my own style in clothes. I'm less influenced by fads than I used to be.
• My face, neck, and shoulders look bigger and stronger.
• If I've been wearing glasses, I may be ready to try contact lenses.
• I'm more likely to act on my sexual urges, especially through masturbation. I may go through some confusion about my sexual orientation.

Girls Only

• I look more like a young woman than a girl. My hips are rounded, and my breasts continue to become fuller.
• My pubic hair is becoming thick and full. I may have some downy growth on my lower abdomen or upper thighs.
• I'm careful about my appearance. I shower regularly and I use sanitary pads quite lavishly. I may not feel ready to try tampons.
• I'm close to my adult height, especially if I've started menstruating. (Bones usually don't grow much in length once menstruation has begun.) But if I haven't had my first period yet, I could do a lot more growing in the interim.

Boys Only

• This is the year when I'm likely to have the most rapid growth in height. But even if I don't grow much now, I still have lots of time. I may not reach my full height for another five years.
• My "fat stage," if I had one, is over. My body is looking more muscular.
• I look ungainly because of the way my bones grow. First my hands and feet get bigger, then my forearms and lower legs, then my upper arms and thighs, and finally my hips and chest.
• My lower jaw gets bigger, changing the contours of my face.
• My voice continues to deepen. It may happen gradually, or my voice may crack and sound hoarse as my larynx and vocal cords grow.
• My Adam's apple becomes more prominent.
• My penis gets a little longer and a lot thicker.
• My pubic hair becomes darker and denser. It may start growing up toward my belly button.
• If I haven't had wet dreams before, I'll have them now.
• I get a little more hair on my upper lip and chin, and my sideburns grow longer. If my facial hair is especially dark and dense, I may need to shave, although probably only a couple of times a week. If the hair is fair and sparse, I may not need to shave for another few years.
• The hair on my arms and legs gets darker.
• I could start getting acne.

Age Fifteen and Up
All Young Adults

• I'm definitely looking more like an adult than a child. My features become sharper and more defined.
• My posture may still look a little awkward. I may hunch over when I'm standing, or lumber when I walk. But gradually my stance will look relaxed, and I'll slowly develop a new sense of poise.
• My appearance matters to me, although I don't agonize over it so much anymore. I spend a lot of time on my hair. My room, though, may still be a mess.
• My sexual orientation becomes more firmly established. I'm more likely to act on my sexual desires.

Young Women Only

• My physical and sexual development is almost complete. I'll continue to gain some weight, and my breasts and hips may get fuller.
• My reproductive organs are fully developed. But the tissue around my cervix may continue to undergo changes for a few years, making me particularly vulnerable to long-term problems from sexually transmitted diseases.
• I may or may not masturbate regularly and have involuntary orgasms in my sleep.
• If my periods have been light and sporadic, they'll gradually become more regular. But my cycle may be longer than 28 days, possibly 40 days or even longer, and may go on that way for several years.
• My appetite settles down now that my phase of rapid growth is over, but it's still vital that I eat well-balanced meals.
• way I eat now will affect my future long-term health. I need you to make sure that I don't skip breakfast or eat only fries for lunch.

Young Men Only

• I'm still growing. I need to eat a lot of food in order to fuel these changes, and I will for another few years. I might need a huge snack only an hour after dinner.
• My shoulders broaden and my muscles continue to develop, sometimes appearing to bulge beneath my skin. My veins, especially in my arms, become more prominent.
• By sixteen, I'll likely need to shave, but probably not every day yet.
• I may get hair on my chest and abdomen.
• My sperm are fully mature.