Helping a self-conscious youth

The beginnings of anorexia nervosa

Eating disorders tend to appear when a person is facing several changes once. One such time is early adolescence, when a child faces a changing body, emerging sexual feelings, and is likely graduating to a senior school. Life may seem out of control. Food may seem like the one thing your child can control.

Anorexia nervosa, a drastic weight loss from dieting, is a predominantly female disorder. It doesn't usually develop until between ages thirteen and twenty-five. However, symptoms of anorexia can begin as young as age nine.

Anorexia may start with the child establishing a strict rule of no desserts. Then she may also exclude bread from her diet. She could go on to deny herself more and more foods until she's existing on only celery sticks and water, or just water.

Maybe your child has turned vegetarian. If she is unwilling to eat higher-fat vegetarian foods such as nuts, seeds, tofu, and legumes, her preference may be masking the beginnings of an eating disorder, especially if her new way of eating is accompanied by weight fluctuations and a preoccupation with her weight or shape.

Behind this potentially fatal illness is a strong desire to be thin, even though the child may be thin to begin with. However, some children who become anorexic were heavy, were ostracized because of their weight, were encouraged to diet and praised when they lost pounds.

Seeing a child struggle with an eating disorder might make you feel helpless. You can best help her by keeping communication flowing, but do talk about things other than food and weight. Avoid power struggles over food. What your child needs most is to know that you care about her. As a family member, not a therapist, express concern about her health and seek help from your family doctor or an eating-disorder clinic. Don't wait until you can persuade her to seek help. Anorexics believe their only problem is being too fat.