Teens facing discrimination

High school racial trends

Even in communities where children of diverse backgrounds have played at each other's houses since elementary school, the tables in the local high school's cafeteria may readily divide along racial lines. Unless there is intense bullying or racial conflict within your teen's school, you shouldn't worry too much about this division. In their search for identity, teens may hang out only with others of the same background. In general, people overreact about a group of teens who appear to be of one race or ethnic background and who hang out together in one place. Shopping mall managers have expelled groups of visible minority teens, thinking they pose a gang problem. Police, too, may move them out of a park or off the street corner. If your teen had somewhere else to go, he'd be unlikely to get involved in this kind of problem. As a parent, you might offer him opportunities to meet different groups of kids in safe environments, perhaps in sports at the community centre or in your religion's youth group. You might also be the valiant parent who allows your teen to invite his friends into the rec room for an evening of videos or playing cards, as long as you can provide the appropriate supervision.

When your teen is the target of derogatory name-calling or exclusion by other kids at school, she may become withdrawn or resist going to school, but still be reluctant to confide in her parents. If she does want to talk with you about such problems, reassure her that the behaviour of the other kids is abnormal and that she won't experience that kind of negative attention all her life. Together, you can work out how she might deal with these comments and still feel good about herself. Perhaps she should just ignore them? After all, "they're the ones who have the problem." Sometimes a little humour dropped into the situation might make everyone laugh and break up the tension. If she is a wit, she might carry that off successfully. Another solution might be for your teen to find allies and form a group of like-minded friends who shrug off negative comments from others. Warn her to avoid confrontation with troublesome groups of kids -- too many teens get hurt by others because they fail to ask for adult help against belligerent groups of teens.

If racism is a serious, ongoing problem talk with a teacher, a counsellor, or the principal at the school. All provincial ministries of education have anti-racism policies and guidelines for the development of inclusive curriculum and learning resources. Many school boards also have services such as an anti-racism or equity coordinator to promote racial tolerance. Your teen might like to become involved, particularly if he is socially conscious or a good speaker. Above all, don't hesitate to visit the school or work with other parents, if necessary, to ensure your teen's physical and emotional safety.