Discipline strategies for parents

One of the key concepts that a child must understand during his or her preschool years is that of differentiating between good and bad behaviour. Pointing out to your child something that she has done, and labelling it as inappropriate, is part of the process of disciplining a child. Preschoolers simply "don't know better" -- it is your job to teach your child acceptable behaviour.

Tips from Dr. Cathryn Tobin, pediatrician and mother of four

Tip 1
Parents should think of discipline as guidance, not punishment. If you decided to take up golf and the golf instructor yelled, threatened or lectured you with every bad stroke and never taught you what a good stroke looks like, chances are you'd feel discouraged and simply give up the sport. Well, kids are the same way. Children need to know what good behaviour looks like; so the next time your child's behaviour causes you grief, before you say a word, pause and ask yourself, "How can I use this situation to teach my child something positive?" Misbehaviour is a great deal less frustrating when you look at it as a learning opportunity.

Tip 2
Children need to hear the word no in order to accept it. Although it is often easier to cave in, it is not in your child's best interest to do so. When your little guy or gal won't take no for an answer, use a firm but neutral voice, and say something like, "I know you're disappointed, but no means no." Then, don't rub it in, and don't feel you need to justify yourself; just move on.

Tip 3
Kids communicate through their behaviour. The little gal isn't going to say, "Hey Mom, I'm really tired. I think I'll go to bed." Instead, she'll pitch a fit, act hyper or whine. A youngster's behaviour tells us what her words can't yet express. Parents often react to a child's misbehaviour and overlook the underlying cause. But when you hang back and think about what's going on, you are bound to find changes you can make that minimize misbehaviour without you having to say a word to the child. For instance, tantrums can often be avoided by putting a sleepy child to bed earlier.