Sex addicts build up a tolerance to a certain level of excitement and have to increase the risk level of their behaviour to achieve the same sense of satisfaction. This can include unprotected sex with strangers, which exposes them to sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies.
The repercussions are also felt in your personal life. "Your partner finds out you're cheating on them to get your fix, your boss finds out you've been watching porn online at work ... things start catching up to you," Lawson says.
Getting help
Cold turkey is the oft prescribed treatment for many addictions; alcoholics quit drinking and drug addicts get clean. Are recovering sex addicts therefore expected to give up sex for good, too? Not exactly, Lawson says.
"It's about eliminating unhealthy arousal," she explains. "Similar to an eating disorder, where the challenge is to develop a healthy relationship with food, sex addicts must develop a healthy relationship with sex."
In the early stages of recovery, an addict will abstain from sex until the mind has rested and a supportive recovery base has been built. Only then can he or she begin to have healthy sex with a primary partner again.
If you're concerned about your sexual behaviour, visit www.sexhelp.com and take the Sexual Addiction Screening Test for a preliminary assessment. Bellwood Health Centre also offers free in-person assessments and there are several nation-wide 12-step programs available to those struggling with their urges, including Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (www.localslaa.org).
"The problem is more common than people realize, it's just that up until now there's been so much shame surrounding these issues that people weren't open to talking about it," Lawson says. "But I think it's important for people to know that it’s more than possible to recover from it."
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