Culture & Entertainment

Santa's Wasting His Time...

Canadian Living
Culture & Entertainment

Santa's Wasting His Time...

So we’re on our way downtown to see Ross Petty’s holiday show, Snow White The Deliciously Dopey Family Musical, and as we drove, Baby Boy started thinking about Santa. Baby Boy: You know, Santa’s just wasting his time going to all the houses. Me: Wait, what?  Why? Baby Boy: Because he has to do each one on it’s own.  Waste of time. Me: But how else would he do it?  Plus he is fast. Darling Daughter: And magic. Baby Boy: Oh. Thinking a bit. Baby Boy: It’s a waste of time for sleepin’. Me: For who? Baby Boy: For Santa. Me: Why? Baby Boy: He can’t sleep on that night. Me: Well, no he can’t, but that’s his job. Baby Boy: But it’s only on that night he can’t sleep? Me: Right. Baby Boy: Doesn’t he get tired the next day? Me: Of course, and that’s why he only does it once a year. Baby Boy: Why can’t he do it every day? Darling Daughter: Cause it’s too hard for him. Me: And it takes a lot of energy and magic for him to do that.  Plus he has to make all the presents, well he doesn’t, the elves do, but still… Darling Daughter: They would have only one day to make them. Baby Boy: They could do that. Me: No, they can’t, it’s too much. Thinking again. Baby Boy: But what if Santa’s bag breaks? Darling Daughter: It won’t.  And they have 364 days to get ready. Baby Boy: Why? Me: Cause Santa only works that once a year.  I mean he does other work throughout the year, but he only delivers presents once a year. Darling Daughter: Like, he gets a summer vacations. Baby Boy: What does he do in summer?  He’s meant for cold. Darling Daughter: He’s a normal person, Fergus.  Just because he can do magic doesn’t mean he’s not normal. Baby Boy: Wait, I’m getting a magic wand for Christmas, so I can go all around the world giving away presents. Me: Oh, you think so? Baby Boy: Wait –where would I get the elves? Me: Um, I’m not sure. Darling Daughter: Oh, I’ve got it!  Why don’t you hire a whole bunch of short people, dress them up and call them elves? Me: That’s not a good idea. Baby Boy: Why? Darling Daughter: You give them costumes and they’ll make toys. Baby Boy: No, get a bunch of toy makers and dress them up as elves. Darling Daughter:  But they have to be short. Darling Daughter: Then get a bunch of kids or toddlers –smart toddlers or a bunch of 5 year olds. Me: That's called child labour and it’s against the law. Darling Daughter: But it’s not labour if they want to, I mean he has to ask them. Luckily we arrived at the theatre just in time to avoid a lengthy discussion on history, politics and civil rights.  
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Santa's Wasting His Time...

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