Culture & Entertainment

Top 10 Holiday Eating Tips

Canadian Living
Culture & Entertainment

Top 10 Holiday Eating Tips

Every once in a while, Walt Anson sends his daughter Tina (who works with me) a fun email. And sometimes she passes them on to me. I have heard some of this stuff before, but all together it made me laugh out loud. And so, in the spirit of the season, I am sharing them with my friends, all of you! [caption id="attachment_14447" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Bonus tip: Eat chocolate. As much as you can. It’s the law this month. January, no chocolate is allowed.[/caption] 1. Avoid carrot sticks Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re probably serving rum balls. 2. Drink as much eggnog as you can And quickly. It’s rare... You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It’s later than you think. It's Christmas! 3. If something comes with gravy, use it That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat. 4. Ask if the mashed potatoes are made with skim or whole milk If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission. 5. Do not snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating The whole point of going to a holiday party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it. Hello? 6. Do not exercise between now and New Year’s You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog. 7. If it’s good, eat it If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the centre of attention. They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you’re never going to see them again. 8. Same for pies Apple, pumpkin, mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day? 9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards! 10. One final tip If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Like I said, it made me laugh (#7 is my favourite). And really, isn’t that a gift this season? Friends, family, coworkers who bring smiles to our faces – and sometimes make us laugh out loud. How about you? Any holiday tips?
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Culture & Entertainment

Top 10 Holiday Eating Tips

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