10 things no one tells you about planning a wedding

Author: Canadian Living


10 things no one tells you about planning a wedding

Planning a wedding can be one of the best times and one of the most stressful times in your life. With budgets to manage, family members to placate and lifelong dreams to fulfil (whether they're your own or your significant other's), it's understandable that the pressure is high.

To get more insight into the wedding planning process we polled a few people who have been through it all and lived to share their stories. Here are some things no one tells you about planning a wedding.

1. Trimming the guest list doesn't equal trimming the cost

"No one tells you that cutting guests doesn't necessarily mean cutting costs. You don't want to end up with a nice party that you wish more of your friends and family could have come to. Keep costs in perspective: Is the $3,000 photographer or videographer worth the equivalent additional guests you could have had?"
-- Jim, 32, Ottawa

2. There are no rules
"There are a lot of traditions people tell you that you ‘have to' do, but no one tells you that you actually don't. Hey, if throwing the bouquet is going to embarrass the three single girlfriends you have in attendance, just skip it."
-- Jennifer, 30, Kamloops, B.C.

3. Do what makes you happiest
"We decided on a destination wedding at a location that had good diving, which is something we love to do on vacation. We knew there would be people who couldn't afford it or who wouldn't like the sun and sand aspect, but you're either willing to comprise or you're not. No one tells you to just stick to your guns while you're planning. Funnily enough, the family members who were the most reluctant to come ended up having the greatest time."
-- Sarah, 33, St. John's, N.L.

4. Only share what you want to share

"No one tells you that other people don't really care as much as you do about the details, except maybe your mom. Limit the amount of details you subject people to about the planning -- they're probably just asking to be polite."
-- Meaghan, 28, Kingston, Ont.

5. Factor in what the day means to others

"People tried to tell us that our wedding wasn't really ‘for' us, but we didn't listen. Now looking back, we understand how it was so much more about our families and everyone getting together. I wish we had understood that a bit more during the planning."
-- Sonia, 29, Winnipeg

Page 1 of 2 -- Learn more wedding planning secrets from Canadians across the country on page 2
6. Avoid getting caught up in the minor details
"No one tells you how many opinions you're going to be expected to have! I found myself obsessing over the exact shade of violet that my tablecloths had to be and literally losing sleep over similar tiny details -- all of which were insignificant looking back now."
-- Michelle, 35, Toronto

7. Don't stress about the guest list
"No one tells you that people will feel slighted that you didn't invite them to your wedding. But I wish someone had also told us not to worry -- that the people who genuinely liked you before the wedding, will still like you after."
-- Patrick, 29, North Bay, Ont.

8. You can't do it all
"I was all about the DIY aspect of the wedding in the planning stage, to offset the cost and put a personal touch on things. No one told me that I was kidding myself and how much help I would find myself having to ask for. You cannot possibly do everything on your own."
-- Carrie, 33, Moncton, N.B.

9. Put aside your idea of perfection
"No one tells you that no matter how hard you try, not everything will be perfect, and that's OK. The things that do go wrong (like the officiant getting my name wrong halfway through the ceremony and a huge storm blowing in and cutting the cocktail hour short) will be the things that make the stories you'll laugh about later."
-- Janice, 30, Kingston, Ont.

10. Hire a professional photographer
"We decided to ask an uncle with a decent camera to snap some photos throughout the day instead of hiring a photographer. I wish someone had told us that we might regret not having any posed shots of our families or ourselves afterward."
-- Ben, 35, Sydney, N.S.

No one ever said planning a wedding was easy, and the process is different for everyone, so be sure to keep these stories in mind leading up to the big day.

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10 things no one tells you about planning a wedding