How to protect your parents from fraud

How to help your folks
In some cases, seniors turn to their children for help straightening out financial affairs in the face of fraud. But many victims, ashamed to admit they have been duped, keep the fiascos secret. It has been seven years since Katharine lost her $80,000 in a real-estate scam, but many of the people closest to her don't know it happened. "My husband has four sons, and I have one daughter," she says. "We never told the sons. My daughter was aware, and her response was, 'Thank God I didn't have any money to invest.' She knew we lost everything. She could not help 'fraud-proof' us."

In this age of proliferating scams, what can we do to help protect Mom and Dad? How do you have "The Talk" with your parents without sounding like, well, a parent?

• Cut to the chase. "Don't be squeamish about this," advises Cravit. "Just approach it head-on." Robertson, the PhoneBusters fraud cop, also likes the direct approach, even with his own parents. "Dad is 79 and Mom is 80 years old," he says. "I sat down and explained to them the value of personal information to criminals and the problems it can cause them once compromised. People of all ages and sexes can be victims of fraud. Leave the lines of communication open to invite them to share any questions or concerns they may be experiencing."

• A more subtle approach. For those who don't feel comfortable barrelling into the topic of fraud, there are always more subtle methods. "When you're at your parents' house, you could just say, 'Oh, I read this article about this happening to somebody.' Or, 'I just got one of those e-mails. Do you ever get them?' And then you can naturally get into the conversation," suggests Ages. "The more comfortable your parents are with you, the more chance that they're going to tell you, 'This happened to me' or, 'I was wondering about this.'" Robertson adds that it's smarter to recognize the threat and deal with it. "We will have to change our habits," he says. "And quick."

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