Reader's story: Finding the time

September 2009

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Susan, you're bang on in your Opening lines: Memories, precious memories article.

My family history has so many big, blank spaces that it's keeping me up at night with the sweats. Just the other day my daughter and I unpacked one of several boxes from a move we made from the country to the city when my husband suddenly passed away. What did I find? A journal I recall buying soon after my first child was born. The book is still empty. I recall thinking over and over again so many decades ago that I'd fill out the first page tomorrow, or in an hour. And i really meant to fill the journal from front to back.

While I cleaned the house and lookied after my baby, the years came and went sooner than I could have ever imagined. I believe now that the real hindrance to my putting pen to paper was that I had no concept of time. If I did, my responsibilities to living life in the moment prevailed.

But now I'm now afraid that I've left a huge hole of nothingness just as my parents did (with only photographs and lovely keepsakes) for my children. Are we in this day and age not too concerned with leaving a legacy on a page?

I again dropped the ball and didn't get around to having my dad on tape during his last years, when I myself cared for him. Yes, I sat around many times and listened to the stories of his upbringing, but there are huge holes and I cannot seem to connect the dots. On my mother's side we know a bit more, as uncles have helped with research. But the memories and facts that only my father would know and could tell are gone.

I'm now marking all my photos with detail – I've just recently taken days to sort and mark hundreds. I'll keep at it.