3. Participate in doing good deeds
The third thing parents can do to facilitate healthy self-esteem in their children is to direct and help them perform good deeds. This teaches children to be aware of the life of others and enables the development of empathy and altruistic behaviour. These are invaluable ingredients for creating healthy relationships and developing a sense of responsibility for making the world a better place. It's important for children to be encouraged to be helpful to the extent of their ability.
4. Make the rules of life clear
The last thing parents can do to boost their children's self-esteem is to implement structure. You can help by setting rules about how much sleep is enough, deciding when the family eats, where the kids are allowed to jump up and down, and what will happen if your child hits someone.
Parents can help their children internalize structure by commenting on daily routines, specifying appropriate behaviour, providing feedback and giving consequences for undesirable behaviour.
A good sense of self doesn't come naturally to children. It is something that must be fostered, developed and nurtured. With these four ingredients: valuing, competency, good deeds, and structure, you can help your child form the basic building blocks for developing self-esteem.
Gary Direnfeld is a child-behaviour expert, a social worker, and the author of Raising Kids Without Raising Cane (Secrets of the Trade, 1992). Since graduating with a Masters degree from the University of Toronto in 1985, Gary has not only helped people get along or feel better about themselves, but has also enjoyed an extensive career in public speaking. He provides insight on issues ranging from child behaviour management and development; to family life; to socially-responsible business development.
