The criticizer: Your old roommate's sarcastic routine was cute back in college, but now his belittling remarks and judgemental attitude are wearing thin. He puts you down to boost his own self esteem, but you're tired of being a punch line.
The splitter: Your sister-in-law is one of the trickiest vamps of all. The Jeckyll and Hyde of the emotion-sucking world, she greets you with open arms at one family dinner, and then at the next she's dropping not-so-subtle hints that she thinks her brother married beneath him. You don't want your husband to pick sides, but her unpredictable behaviour is draining you of your will to spend time with his family.
Weapon of choice
Forget garlic and holy water, Dr. Orloff says the best way for a vampire victim to become a vampire slayer is to stay calm.
"Whatever you do, don't panic. Just breathe," Dr. Orloff suggests. "Don't blurt out something you'll regret and don't overreact, because that's exactly what they want you to do." If you want your friend to change his vampiric ways, you have to plan what you're going to say to him ahead of time.
"Approach your friend in a non-confrontational manner, communicate your issues with his behaviour and establish some boundaries for both you and him to avoid feeling victimized in the future," she says.
Most importantly, remember that vampires have to be invited in, so it's probably best to turn as many away at the door as you can. No need to drive a stake through your best friend's ego, because that relationship can be salvaged with proper communication, but any peripheral emotional vampires – acquaintances, hairstylists, dog walkers – are best left out on the front stoop.
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Dr. Judith Orloff's book, Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life, is a New York Times bestseller.
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