Finding a healthy balance: The single parent formula

You get home from a long day of work. You're tired and hungry and just want to put your feet up and relax, but you can't. You have to begin your other full-time job -- parenting. You have dinner to cook, homework with kids, and clean up duties to be done all within the four hours before bedtime.

As a parent, your job really doesn't end until the kids have been completely settled in bed. Single parents, by far, face more challenges in keeping up with the demands of family life. We don't have the luxury of time-sharing with a spouse in fulfilling domestic obligations, nor do we have the economic means to afford extra help. This often amounts to an overworked, sleep deprived, irritable mother who may unknowingly be exerting those same stresses on her children.

Why would a single parent want to find a balance in her life? Because creating a balanced family lifestyle will help her to find ways in coping with the chaos of single parenthood.

Balance can mean many things to different people. By definition, balance, as it pertains to lifestyle, is a physical equilibrium -- a mental and emotional steadiness. To achieve a balanced lifestyle one must develop a formula that produces a healthy mental, physical and emotional outcome. This is not always so easy to follow if you're a parent and it seems nearly impossible if you're a single parent like me. It can take years before you find your comfort level but it's all worth the effort.

For parents, "balance" is a formula including many more factors in the equation than it does for a single adult. The things you will juggle in creating a balance include kids, career, friends, extended family, extracurricular activities, and last but most importantly, yourself.

During my transition from being married with children to single parenthood, I experienced a great "unbalance" in every aspect of my Self -- emotional, spiritual, and physical. It took some time to understand the extent of the domestic responsibilities that I now had to assume on my own. It took about three years for me to achieve a comfortable balance.

What I can share is the process of how I achieved my balance. Not everyone will feel comfortable in approaching life this way, but sometimes it becomes a necessity when you walk a thin line between chaos and order.