Should couples live together before marriage?

"Yes. It gives two people a chance to judge their compatibility before making a further commitment." – Chris N., 35, Toronto

"I come from a deeply religious Roman Catholic upbringing, and at one point in my life, I would have said no, two people should not live together before marriage because it takes away from the holy sacrament of marriage. But, after living on my own and just recently moving in with my boyfriend, I would say that it is fine to move in together when the time is right and you truly know you want to spend the rest of your life with this person – so your plan is marriage." – Theresa Sedore, 24, Thunder Bay, Ont.

"Yes. Before making an important decision like who you're going to marry, you should be sure that it's the right person." – Al Mchugh, 59, Markham, Ont.

It doesn't matter, it depends on the relationship
"When I was young, two people didn't live together without getting married first. My parents would have disowned me from the family. But as I got older, I realized that a relationship between two people is loving and trustful whether you have a marriage certificate or not." – Patricia Cooper, 58, Nanaimo, B.C.

"I don't think that living together premarriage has any impact, good or bad on the subsequent marriage. If it's going to work, it's going to work, no matter what you do beforehand." – Fredérique, 26, Ottawa

"I see no harm in couples living together before marriage or without ever marrying. Living together holds no less a commitment than marriage." – Pat White, 65, Chilliwack, B.C.

"It has to do with expectations. I've known couples who expect the world from each other after getting married or moving in together, and they end up unhappy. I've also known very open-minded couples who get married right away and they're ready for anything that goes along with it. Some people don't need to live together first. That said, I've lived with my boyfriend for almost five years now, but I don't feel that it is a prep-period for our married life. We've dealt with life, like money and death, as a couple and as individual persons within our relationship. If it is a prep-period then we will be the world's perfect couple. If you pick someone who respects the commitment as much as you do, you actually like each other, and you can learn to deal with life together, then marriage and living together are really the same thing." – Lisa Hannam, 32, Hamilton

"People should do what suits them. For some, living together premarriage is a deal breaker, and for others it's not. But couples who differ on that matter are probably in some trouble." – Rebecca R., 28, Toronto

"I wouldn't marry anyone I hadn't lived with, but I wouldn't move in with someone I wasn't engaged to. Breaking up with someone you live with is just as messy as divorce, without the lawyers and rules. Scary. At the same time, marrying someone you've never lived with just seems foolhardy somehow. And old-fashioned." – Zoe C., 27, Kingston.

"It's entirely up to the individual couple. Everyone is different with different needs and reasons and should neither feel pressured nor dissuaded by others. If it feels like the right thing to do, then you should do it. As long as you've considered what will result from that decision and you're doing it for the right reasons. I once lived with a boyfriend and it was disastrous. We moved in together out of convenience, both having moved to a new city. It was the wrong thing to do, for the wrong reasons. When the relationship ended, he was still around because he had no place to go. I was miserable." – Emma Lowry, 31, rural Southern Ontario

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