Women hooked on cybersex

Is it an addiction?
The medical community is still debating whether to formally label the excessive use of cybersex -- in which the individual has no control over their habit -- as a formal "addiction," but many psychologists who treat men and women who are hooked on Internet sex maintain it is a legitimate compulsive disorder.

"Women can, and do, develop addictions to chat rooms and Internet relationships," says Dr. Goertz. "Many partners of people addicted to Internet interactions (cybersex chat rooms etc.) consider their partner to be unfaithful and often label their online involvement an affair."

Those most strongly hooked on Internet sex are likely to spend hours each day masturbating to pornographic images or with an individual contacted through a chat room.

Warning signs
Goertz says the best warning signs of any addictive behavior, including cybersex, is a change in regular life patterns seemingly without cause. Here are some other signs that indicate you, your sister or girlfriend may be hooked on cybersex.

• The need to return to sex sites to escape problems or relieve boredom, tension and loneliness.
• Restlessness, irritability and tension when not online.
• The need to spend more and more time or money on Internet sex activities.
• Preoccupation with cybersex. For example, you are thinking about when you can next visit a pornographic site while making dinner or in a work meeting.
• Unsuccessful attempts to reduce or quit use.
• Lying about the extent of time spent on the activity...not aware of time passing.
• Neglecting family, friends and work.
• Actual or threatened loss of significant relationships, job and financial stability because of computer use.

Resources:
Treatment for cybersex addiction includes individual counselling and support groups for addicts and their partners. If you or a woman you know is struggling with cybersex, check out the following helpful resources and counselling programs:
• Cyber Sexual Addiction: www.cybersexualaddiction.com
• Sex Addicts Anonymous: www.saa-recovery.org
• Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous: www.slaafws.org
• Codependents of Sex Addicts: www.cosa-recovery.org
• Codeps (www.codeps.org) offers online support for partners.
• Tangled in the Web: Understanding Cybersex from Fantasy to Addiction -- a self-help recovery guide that is also helpful for spouses and family members living with an online sex addict. Available at Chapters.ca