The process of getting over a relationship is different for everyone, says Cheryl Grant, an individual, family and couples counsellor at Abundant Living Counselling Group in Ottawa. She put together a five-step action plan that allows time for you to acknowledge your feelings and grieve the loss of the relationship at your own pace, but also emphasizes taking time to reflect, be well and, most importantly, rediscover fun.
1. Face your feelings
It is perfectly natural to feel hurt and angry after a break up, and the best thing you can do for yourself is to deal with what's going on inside. "It is not physically or psychologically healthy for us to keep things bottled up inside," says Grant.
"The most important reason to acknowledge painful feelings after a break up is so that they can be released." Get out your feelings in whatever manner you prefer, whether it's by journaling, blogging or just talking to a good friend. "Actively try to identify what thoughts are going through your head when you're upset, then let them go," she advises.
2. Do what you enjoy
Boost that positive, forward-moving momentum by focusing on you. "Identify the simple things in life that bring you joy, and take the time to invest in those things," says Grant. "Spend time with the children in your life or with pets. Spend time outdoors connecting with nature, with your creativity or with music." It's also important to laugh. "Laughter is good medicine and it's contagious," Grant says. "Try to maintain some level of humour and humility whether you're by yourself or in the company of good friends and family."
Page 1 of 2 -- Learn the benefits of setting and sticking to personal goals after a break up on page 2
