Individuals who have lived alone for periods of time and have established ways of doing things may be more susceptible to the tendency to train and more resistant to being trained. Likewise, those with rigid ideas for how things should be done may fall prey to wanting their partner to do things like them.
We aren't clones
As the title implies, the desire to train your partner to be perfect is more about wanting them to be like you and do things your way. But we are not clones of each other. That would make for a boring relationship!
It is important to recognize that different ways of doing things are not wrong, just different. It is equally important to recognize that our partner’s way of doing things makes sense to them. The old saying, “not seeing the forest for the trees” applies to this situation. Couples can become so embroiled in the small details of the everyday they risk ignoring larger and more important issues such as parenting and money management.
Are you a power player?
The first step in dealing with this problem is to ask yourself why you want your partner to do things your way. What is behind this need? Often it is about power and control in the relationship. Once you recognize this is what you are dealing with, you need to cease micromanaging your partner and allow them the room to accomplish the task their way. This involves a shift from power and control to cooperation and collaboration.
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