How erotic fiction can spice up your relationship

How erotic fiction can spice up your relationship

© Eye Media Image by: © Eye Media Author: Canadian Living


How erotic fiction can spice up your relationship

Everywhere you go, someone seems to be talking about the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. The extremely popular book series, which has sold over 20 million copies to date, is said to have drastically affected women's sex lives and relationships, and has put the spotlight on erotic fiction, bringing the once-taboo genre into the mainstream.

To learn more about how erotic fiction can benefit romantic relationships, we turned to Logan Levkoff, an author and sexuality educator who is also a big fan of the Fifty Shades of Grey series. She shares a few significant ways that erotic fiction can help improve your sex life.

1. It allows you to share with your partner
"Reading aloud can be a great way of talking 'dirty' without actually having to come up with your own text," says Levkoff.

Select a page, paragraph or sequence within a book that resonates with you, place a bookmark at that page and keep it on your night table, she advises.

The next time you and your other half are about to hop into bed, ask him if you can read him an X-rated excerpt from the book you've got on the go. You might be surprised at how interested he'll be. Just remember to take it seriously and leave the giggling aside.

2. It enhances excitement
They say men think about sex every seven seconds, which could explain why your partner may want to have sex more often than you do. For women, that excitement and readiness for sex doesn't always happen so instantly.

Levkoff advises using the book as a tool to help get you in the mood. "Reading erotic fiction turns your mind and body on, which is great for foreplay," she says.

This could be why many of the women who have read Fifty Shades of Grey admit to feeling so awkward and exposed when reading the novel on an airplane, on the subway or in public.

Page 1 of 2 -- From sharing sexual fantasies with your partner to role-playing in the bedroom, discover three more ways erotic fiction can spice up your love life on page 2.
3. It provides ideas
It's no coincidence that sales of sex toys have drastically increased along with the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey. Erotica opens up people's minds to all the toys that are out there and introduces readers to new ideas when it comes to sex.

"Erotica can introduce you to experiences or fantasies that you may never have thought about before," says Levkoff.

By reading erotic fiction, you not only get new ideas, but these ideas become normalized and comfortable, she explains.

It's as if you've gone through the experience already through reading, so turning an idea into reality no longer seems so out of the box or embarrassing.

4. It opens up sexual dialogue
The idea of sharing your fantasies with your partner can be seen as taboo. Women are often worried about how their partner will react and whether or not they will be judged. "Erotica can give you the language for talking to your partner about your fantasies," says Levkoff.

Why not tell your other half about the steamy book you've been reading? Tell him that the author wrote a fantasy that you just can't get out of your head and then share that fantasy with him, she advises. This will make you feel less vulnerable when sharing something new since you're discussing a book and someone else's thoughts as opposed to your own.

5. It inspires role-playing in the bedroom
Erotica can also be used as a script for role-playing. "Sometimes we are uncomfortable with role-playing because it may feel strange to act out those traditional and sometimes cheesy scenarios like cop/robber, patient/nurse or teacher/student," says Levkoff.

Erotica gives you a script for acting out a scenario that turns you on. "You can be the characters in your erotic work of choice and follow what they do or say," says Levkoff. "You don't need to make up your own scene because it's been done for you," she adds.

Now that erotic fiction has been deemed trendy, many bookstores have whole sections devoted to the genre. If you loved Fifty Shades of Grey and want to read more books of the sort it's easier than ever to find options. Use these books as tools to enhance your sex life and open your mind to new and exciting possibilities with your partner.

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How erotic fiction can spice up your relationship