Are you having a technological affair?

Living in the age of social media and our ability to communicate with people across the planet with a few swift keystrokes is a definite blessing in many ways. We’re able to maintain friendships overseas, have long-distance relationships, and we’re even able to conduct business on a global scale without worrying about where we’re located on the planet.

That said, the digital age has also made it very easy for us to connect with people in a technological realm without thinking too much about the consequences. People are now able to form bonds and relationships with others they meet on dating sites, chatrooms, gaming sites, comments sections of blogs/articles, and so on. So what happens when our bonds become so strong with these people (or with one other person, perhaps), that we end up investing more of our time and energy into our relationship with them, than with our immediate significant other?

A recent survey showed one in five people blamed Facebook for ruining their relationship. But I suppose the question can be asked: Is your relationship already in trouble if you have a wandering eye in real life or online?

Here are three signs that show you might be having a technological affair, from sex and relationships expert Andrea Syrtash from

1. Your online ‘person’ knows more about your day-to-day life than your significant other.
If you find you’re anticipating telling your virtual friend about the funny thing that happened at the office, or about the strange person you saw on the subway before you want to tell your partner, you might be in trouble. Or perhaps if you’re stressed and need to talk things out, and your instinct is to log on to your computer or smartphone to connect with your friend online rather than turning to your partner, it’s definitely a warning sign.

2. You’re constantly worried about your significant other reading your online correspondence.
If you’ve got nothing to hide or no concerns about your relationship with your online friend, then there should be nothing to worry about. But if you’re going to lengths to shield your communication, or deleting conversations that you already know are too intimate, you might need to reevaluate.

3. You can’t get enough of their messages.
If you find you’re constantly checking your phone or computer for correspondence from your online friend, and find you’re experiencing the same emotions you did when you first met your partner, this is a huge warning sign. Corresponding with them throughout the day is also something to be weary about, because perhaps these are conversations you should be having with your significant other, instead.

Whatever you do, it’s important to always take a step back and ask yourself ‘why?’ What about your relationship with this person online is sending you to these lengths? Is it the rush? The thrill and excitement? Is it boredom? It’s important to focus on the reason for your behaviour in order to come up with a healthy solution.

Make sure to take a moment to fill our out 4th annual Canadian Living Sex Survey, to see how your sex life compares to others across the country.