Photography by Katyann Davidson Credits: Photography by Katyann Davidson
To say that life has been exciting is an understatement. I have been the centre of attention and the master of my universe. I thought that things couldn't get any sweeter and that I had really lived.
I couldn't have been more wrong!
I met little Noah Bublé on Aug. 27, 2013, and my perception of the world and of life changed completely and forever.
During my pregnancy I was nervous. (Maybe all women are?) I wondered if I would be as good a mother to my baby as mine was to me—if I could be as patient, selfless and compassionate as she was. I never spoke of this to Mike. I just held it inside. But when that little boy looked at me for the first time, I realized I had nothing to fear.
I had no clue that this kind of love existed. It was overpowering. I have always loved my family—I love my dog and I love my husband—but â€¨the connection I felt to this little person was something that couldn't compare. I realized that my life was just beginning.
I also realized that I might have been a little hard on my friends who already had kids. They would babble on about little Ella or Logan and how funny, sweet or smart they were. The truth is, they wouldn't shut up about their kids, and I might have found it a tad annoying. Didn't they have something else to talk about? Did they really think their stories were that interesting and that we needed to have two-hour conversations about jumpers or the evolution of baby Cash's crawling?
Once again, I couldn't have been more wrong. In the past several months, I have bored people to death with endless conversations about my incredibly fantastic, beautiful, perfect and amazing child. He makes a poop and my husband and I marvel at his genius! Surely other kids don't make poop the way he does? And at four months of age, I'm pretty sure I heard him say "momma," too. It might have been more of a "maggagaaaaa," but I can't be sure. Oh, and have I mentioned that he is an Olympic Jolly Jumping champion?!
Wait, I'm doing it, aren't I? Sorry, moving on.
I think one of the biggest realizations I've had is that there is no one right way. People will tell you there is, and they'll gladly give you a ton of information on how it should be done, but as a first-time mom, I wanted to discover these things on my own. Sure, I might make some mistakes, but I'll also learn from them. And I'll learn in my own way. For example, some people believe you shouldn't hold or rock your child when you put him to sleep. They say it's OK to let the baby cry, but I just can't do it. I know it takes more time to put him to sleep, but for me it's impossible to do it any other way. There are also different opinions on how long the baby should sleep in bed with you. Though Mike and I know he is old enough to sleep in his crib, we're just not ready to make the switch. What's better than snuggling your baby? And I know I have spent too much time obsessing about my post-baby body. This is something I struggle with every day, not just because of my profession but because I'm a proud woman. I try to keep a healthy attitude, but it can be tough.
Of course, there are successes, too. Friends told us we should forget about going out again, that life as we knew it was over. They said that dinners and movie nights would be a thing of the past, that there would be no more house parties or any of the other fun things childless couples do. I think that drove us to prove them wrong. We take that kid everywhere! Bowling, flying, fine-dining and, yes, even to the movies! And you know what? We take photos of our child doing these things and send them to those friends. Childish? Yes! But oh so fulfilling!
The truth is, we don't know what we're doing. We're just doing it. And we're doing it with love. It may get more complicated, but the best we can do is to love that little boy and surround him with laughter, light and happiness.
He is the reason I was put on this earth, and I thank God for him every day.
Check out our tips on how to get your baby to sleep.
|This story was originally titled "A New Life" in the May 2014 issue.|
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