5 reasons to write a love letter

By: Jen Kirsch

© Author: Canadian Living Credits: ©


5 reasons to write a love letter

By: Jen Kirsch
Though they don't often discuss it, men like to be wooed, too, and there are many sweet little things you can do for your partner that involve nothing more than a pen and paper. Whether it's tucking a note inside his lunch bag or leaving a card on his pillow on a special occasion, these little actions will help make your partner feel loved.

We reached out to Grace Palmer, the editor-in-chief and founder of Romance Never Dies, a website devoted to helping couples discover their romantic side through the art of writing love letters. "A handwritten note sends an important message to your lover before the words are even read," she explains.

Palmer offers five situations that warrant wooing your significant other with the written word.

1. To apologize
A love note is the ideal way to say you're sorry without getting wrapped up in an argument and creating an even bigger fight. Palmer suggests placing a letter on your partner's pillow if you leave early for work, putting a note in his briefcase so he'll see it later or even placing an envelope in a prominent place in the fridge -- all great ways to send your message of apology.

While the reasons for the apology might vary, the words you use probably will not. "Sorry" might be the hardest word, but it's absolutely necessary in this case.

"Use it, and be specific about what you are sorry for and why you regret your actions or words. But be careful not to rationalize or justify what you did," Palmer advises. "Just say you're sorry."

2. To say thanks
Sometimes we take each other for granted as the day-to-day happenings of our relationships become routine. While there may be no real need for an expression of thanks, it's easy to let this slip into a habit of never saying how much you appreciate your partner.

"Saying thank you in a letter is a very romantic way to show your gratitude," says Palmer. "If he makes the coffee every morning no matter what, put a note of thanks and love next to the coffee pot so he knows you're grateful," she suggests.

3. To congratulate
An achievement of some importance, such as getting published, finishing a thesis, passing an exam, winning a race or getting a raise, is an occasion that calls for a congratulatory note.

"By letting your lover know you appreciate the success of their accomplishment, and that you feel a personal sense of pride because of your deep, intimate connection, you are demonstrating your understanding of just how important the accomplishment is," she explains.

4. To celebrate
Birthdays, anniversaries and other dates important to your partner are ideal days to write a card. "By putting romance and passion into what is usually a humdrum day, you will make your significant other feel special, and you'll strengthen the love you're both experiencing," says Palmer.

Use the love letter to show that you understand the importance of the day. "Show your partner you know why it's a big day, and use words of appreciation and empathy to demonstrate the fact," she advises.

5. To destress
Most of us are under a lot of pressure. We're trying to be good workers, lovers and parents, and everything can become a source of stress in our lives.

"Using a love letter to show your partner you understand a particular situation is a very effective way to woo them," says Palmer.

For example, before an important interview, prior to a make-or-break presentation or the night before a competitive event of some kind are all good times to write a note describing your love and understanding about the gravity of the event, she explains.

"Reassure them your love will continue no matter what the outcome might be," says Palmer. "In a stressful situation a person wants to hear words of encouragement, of positive energy, of support and assurance."

A short note, card or letter tells your partner that you care enough to devote the time, effort and thought to writing a genuine message.

"It can be anything from a scribbled Post-it note to a multipage letter on custom stationary," says Palmer. By expressing your feelings and thoughts in words, you let your partner know how much you really care and express your feelings in a way that goes beyond a text, e-mail or verbal message.

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5 reasons to write a love letter