10 ways to make your love unforgettable

Discover amazing tips on how to bond with your partner, inside and outside the bedroom.

By Daniel G. Amen, M.D.

Ways to make your love unforgettable: 1-5

1. Take your partner's breath away.
Do something amazingly thoughtful and out of the ordinary. These events solidify you in the person's limbic brain.

Taking someone's breath away involves surprise, in a wonderful way, even if it is a small gesture of love. You can also teach your partner how you want to be surprised. If you like chocolate, tell him to hide some around the house in creative places so that you can find them throughout the day and think of him. If you like flowers, tell him or her to send them on occasion. Another wonderful little surprise is to leave notes in pockets so that he or she can find them throughout the day. Another idea is to pick up your partner from work for a surprise gourmet lunch in a beautiful park. Find out what makes your partner tick and then find a way to tie it into your little plot to bring more joy and pleasure into his or her world.

2. Do something special on a regular basis.
One of the best ways to make yourself unforgettable is to do things for your partner on a regular basis. Make his or her nervous system expect your call, want to hear your voice, miss your touch or the look into your eyes. Giving someone greeting cards, paper cards, or e-cards on a regular basis is a wonderful way to stay connected. Being your partner's first call in the morning and last call at night helps to solidify you in his or her neural networks. Many greeting card companies and florists have programs to remind you on a regular basis to send something special. It is the reinforcement of thoughtfulness that makes a difference.

3. Frequent, loving eye contact (some culture call it eye gazing) is an especially powerful connection tool for bonding.
Eye contact enhances intimacy. No eye contact decreases bonding and connectedness. New York psychologist Professor Arthur Arun has been studying the dynamics of what happens when people fall in love. He has shown that the simple act of staring into each other's eyes has a powerful impact. He asked to strangers to reveal intimate details about their lives to each other. They did this for an hour and a half. The two strangers were then made to stare into each other's eyes without talking for four minutes. Afterward, many of his couple confessed to feeling deeply attracted to their opposite number, and two of his subjects even married later.

4. Learn what pleases your partner sexually.
Their pleasure should be your pleasure, if you want to make your love life unforgettable. Gain skill in the things that make him or her happy, in what turns him or her on, in what brings joy. Making this a priority will give you many, many dividends.

5. Teach your partner what you like.
Most people get joy by pleasing others. Be an expert communicator by sharing your wants and desires. The brain loves the sounds of excitement. Make sure when your partner is pleasing you that you let him or her know.

Page 1 of 2 - Check out four more great tips on page 2!



Excerpted from Sex on the Brain: 12 Lessons to Enhance Your Love Life, copyright 2007 by Daniel G. Amen, M.D. Excerpted with permission from Harmony, a division of Random House of Canada. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced except with permission in writing from the publisher.

 

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