If your sex life has hit the skids it's time to kick it back into high gear. "Winter is a great time to bring some novelty and mystery to your sex life," says Terri Orbuch, a marriage and relationship therapist and author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great (Delacorte, 2009). "Small changes in your routine and relationship can reignite the sexuality along with the passion."
1. Let's talk about sex
If you want to keep your sex life interesting you have to be willing to talk about it. "This can be helpful, as well as physiologically arousing, for both of you," says Orbuch. That's right: Talking about sex can turn you on. Discuss with your partner what you find exciting and what you would like to be getting more of in bed. Not sure where to start? Think about what your sex life was like at the beginning of your relationship. What do you miss? What could be reintroduced? When you do talk about sex, focus on the positive. Rather than talking about what your partner doesn't do, tell him what he can do (or do more of) to turn you on.
2. Develop sex signals
A wink or a simple caress on the arm is a lot sexier than saying, "Let's go have sex." Developing small signals with your partner is a great way to keep committed sex from falling flat. "Some couples have their own secret or personal ways of telling each other they're interested in having sex," says Orbuch. It can be a nod, a word or even a certain outfit. "This kind of secret language adds mystery and suspense to your relationship since you and your partner are the only ones who can understand and identify the signals."
Page 1 of 2 -- Has a little fantasy ever tickled your fancy? Find three more ways to spice up your bedroom routine on page 2
